Reflect.

Some of my journals stacked on the hardwood floor.

The hard work of acknowledging feelings and thoughts as well as journaling my findings has allowed me to see patterns and investigate so many cycles that I was unable to process earlier in my healing/spiritual journey.

My journaling has been a miracle for allowing me space to investigate my emotions thoroughly and without the intense nervous system reactions that used to come with actually speaking to another person. It’s also a delight now because I am able to spend some time reading through my old writing and finding even more realizations months/years on.

I find the process of growth fascinating. My favourite types of books are novels of transformation. Autobiography of a Yogi, Eat Pray Love, Buy Yourself The F***ing Lilies, Wild, and so many others tell stories of demystification of the self and subsequent rebirth as metamorphosed individuals. It’s amazing to witness through reading and I love poring over my old work for the same reason. I can look at where I was and remember how it felt from an observational point of view. It’s a good reflection of my growth that I don’t keep entangling myself with all that has happened. This is so inspiring to me and encourages me to keep moving on my journey.

It’s a lovely practice even though I used to cringe HARD at the idea. When I started, my journaling was a lifeline. It felt like the only place where I could feel, think, or write about what I was honestly going through. I could actually exist authentically on those pages. It has allowed me to practice speaking my truth to other people as well. I’ve gotten to the point where I can appreciate my own growth and see it as necessary to being human as opposed to a shameful prior existence that I’d rather forget. I can grow from the growth… it’s been such a tremendous source of wisdom for me!

Do you journal? Do you ever look back on what you’ve written? How does witnessing your former self make you feel?

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