There was a situation yesterday with the front door of my home. I should clarify; I felt a situation yesterday with the front door that I chose to paint yellow. I was laying on the living room sofa with the windows and door open. Some men from down the street were walking their dog past … Continue reading The Yellow Door.
Tag: Feelings
Trying.
I have been contemplating my path recently. What else is new? I have been my entire life. But lately I've been able to cut myself some slack on perpetual "trying." All my life I've been told that I'm not trying hard enough. When I have tried, I've more or less hated putting forward the effort. … Continue reading Trying.
Spring Cleaning. Again.
Oh, Spring! I am feeling the call to do all of the things again. The weather is getting nice and warm. The grass is starting to grow again. The plants are coming back. The sun is shining for longer hours. I'm ready to put the winter gear away. I know it's a mistake- it's too … Continue reading Spring Cleaning. Again.
Perfect.
There are times where I am so tired. I am weary from being afraid and feeling imperfect. I get pinned underneath the weight of my stories. It's in this place, when I get good and quiet, that I encounter a feeling... The desperation eases and I feel hope. It's a whisper, to be sure. But … Continue reading Perfect.
Reflect.
Some of my journals stacked on the hardwood floor. The hard work of acknowledging feelings and thoughts as well as journaling my findings has allowed me to see patterns and investigate so many cycles that I was unable to process earlier in my healing/spiritual journey. My journaling has been a miracle for allowing me space … Continue reading Reflect.
Aggressive.
I have a negative relationship with aggression. I don't like it. I don't find it productive in any meaningful way. It's mean, forceful, divisive and just not in line with the way I believe life can be. Nobody wants to be harassed into doing or thinking something to avoid trouble with someone who is unrelenting … Continue reading Aggressive.
Dawn.
It is a new day and I am grateful. For every challenging day I have, I know that a good rest and a new dawn follow. It may not be a better day, but it is different and I know I am also different. Growth happens during rest and I feel that I have more … Continue reading Dawn.
Feel No Evil.
I am the Queen of Avoidance. I say this not as a brag or a proclamation of my greatness, but as a description of the hereditary and culturally upheld nature of this trait. When I was growing up, there was a familiar refrain "ignore it and it will go away." Variations of this included "don't … Continue reading Feel No Evil.
Are You Paying Attention?
Sometimes inspiration strikes hard. Sometimes it's a small whisper. Today it was a slap in the face. *Pay attention to me. Paint this.* I was walking on my favourite forest path and it felt like I could hear everything. Every bird song. Every small critter rustling in the grass. Every snap of a twig. Every … Continue reading Are You Paying Attention?
So… What Do I Want?
You can have whatever or be whatever you want. That's cool. So... What do I want? I have struggled with that question for so much of my life, but I know the truth of it is that I did not struggle when I was young. Very young. I grew up with several siblings. I remember … Continue reading So… What Do I Want?