I feel like there is a difference between self-preservation and fear. Fear is contemplative. It is something that you have time and space to deliberate and is a gradual slide toward dysregulation. There are very real protective mechanisms but what I'm talking about is not that... it's not an instant Fight/Flight/Freeze/Fawn system response. It's a … Continue reading Fear.
Category: Fear
Changes.
September is here. School is back on. Autumn is 3 weeks away. This has always been a time of change for me. I've found myself so dysregulated lately, the last week particularly, and I have seen it as another opportunity to explore. Why am I so stressed out? My daughter is going back to school. … Continue reading Changes.
The Fear of Showing up Imperfectly.
I know that there is so much messaging out there about making sure your work is perfectly aligned with your brand and what society is all about, but I would love to just propose that maybe we can all give ourselves the grace to show up imperfectly once in a while and see what happens. … Continue reading The Fear of Showing up Imperfectly.
The Yellow Door.
There was a situation yesterday with the front door of my home. I should clarify; I felt a situation yesterday with the front door that I chose to paint yellow. I was laying on the living room sofa with the windows and door open. Some men from down the street were walking their dog past … Continue reading The Yellow Door.
Nurture.
Nurture yourself like you would nurture a plant. It's been a while since I've sat down to type up a pondering post but, here I am. I've been in a bit of a weird place lately. One that's felt familiar... always the same, yet always uncomfortable. In my life I find myself oscillating between feeling … Continue reading Nurture.
Aggressive.
I have a negative relationship with aggression. I don't like it. I don't find it productive in any meaningful way. It's mean, forceful, divisive and just not in line with the way I believe life can be. Nobody wants to be harassed into doing or thinking something to avoid trouble with someone who is unrelenting … Continue reading Aggressive.
Healing With Nature.
I previously discussed my return to running in the post Remember. While it has been a slow process, I am grateful for the opportunity to discuss it here. There is a lot to explore and a lot that has been making more sense to me as I retrace my processes and steps. I love the … Continue reading Healing With Nature.
The Dining Room.
Our dining room is a mess... An honest-to-goodness disaster area. I hate it. I hate sitting in it. I don't feel at home eating in it. I hate looking at it. I hate the energy I feel from it. I was journaling the other day, like I do. Every single day I try to write … Continue reading The Dining Room.
So… What Do I Want?
You can have whatever or be whatever you want. That's cool. So... What do I want? I have struggled with that question for so much of my life, but I know the truth of it is that I did not struggle when I was young. Very young. I grew up with several siblings. I remember … Continue reading So… What Do I Want?
Rest.
What comes up when you think about rest? It is a four-letter word for some. I find that rest gets confused with weakness, laziness, and apathy a lot, but rest done well can be a gift and a place of growth. There is no weakness in rest. It is a place to inventory what is … Continue reading Rest.