I know that there is so much messaging out there about making sure your work is perfectly aligned with your brand and what society is all about, but I would love to just propose that maybe we can all give ourselves the grace to show up imperfectly once in a while and see what happens.
That’s a frightening prospect. Showing up is one thing, but we live in a culture that criticizes and picks apart everyone who shows up to anything- the outfit, the hair, the makeup, the family behaviour, the vacation pictures, especially the creative work… It’s all open for interpretation- and inspection.
I am suggesting that we be honest about where we are at in any present moment. If we are creative work creators and are having a dry spell- we can be honest and ok about that. We can sit with the fact that we are still creative and worthy of care and love. We can’t constantly bloom, so we can take the time to nurture ourselves and get ready for the next cycle.
Perhaps there is some exploration that needs to happen into why the abandonment of desire and creativity occurred. I know that what happens for me is that when my nervous system is dysregulated, my body easily shifts into survival mode- my regulated Awareness takes a break and with it my creativity, my curiosity, my confidence, my peace, my calm, my delight, and my joy. AND THIS IS OK.
This Survival perspective becomes a place of nurturing and exploration. This becomes an invitation to a sacred space where I can love myself in all of this imperfection. Unconditional Love- Loving myself without judgement, expectation, condition, and prerequisite. I fulfil my basic needs without any desire to fix myself. I take the time to hear the thoughts and to address where the underlying issue might be projecting from in as calm and cared-for a perspective as possible. I work to observe and hold the parts of me that need support. It’s all worth it. I can hold the sore parts of myself because the Universe holds me.
Nothing lasts forever. I know that when I am able to regulate myself and reconnect with Awareness, my Universe will begin to flow around and through me again. Creativity will pour from me anew and more vibrant and aligned than ever. I know that this practice of regulation and reconnection is something that I can work through during my day. I can feel into it all and I can heal. It has taken so much time and effort with a therapist to get through trauma to a point where I can trust, but it was well worth the exploration.
Learning to be able to trust that I can show up into spaces imperfectly was integral to this healing as well. I don’t have to be perfect. I know that my energy is enough to shift the Universe around me. I know that I can trust that this is part of my purpose. I don’t need to do or be anything. I just need to show up. Everybody is in this Universe for a reason.
With showing up imperfectly comes the desire to make it ok for everyone to show up imperfectly along with me. I don’t require your perfection. I know that I can love what is in front of me in the present moment in all circumstances. I will keep myself safe, but I will not inspect from a place of being triggered by dysregulation. I promise that I will not judge you for showing up and being seen. I desire that others join me, especially women, because I know that when we support and lift each other in this way, healing occurs.
Peace takes precidence and I release my need to be perfect in order to help others feel safe enough to release their perfection too. Imagination and creativity will return. The best way through this is to be still and practice reregulating yourself. A stressed mind is not a creative mind.